Making love to a woman and making love to a man are very different.

Not that I don’t want intimacy and sweet lovemaking with my man. That’s how we bond over time.

But as a 6’5 dude, built, with a big dick and a big personality, it’s no shocker that half the dudes I’ve ever been with want it rough, intense, sweaty, stinky man sex style. No surprise my bf ends up moaning, “Sir, yes sir. Give me your cock, sir” over and over as I pound the cum out of us both – even though we have no bdsm component to our relationship.

After a couple decades, tho, being a man and a complex human, I start to hunger for more…. Do I want to go into extreme bdsm to keep that edgy hot male feeling? I had my little buddy tie me up one day and worship my cock until I was a sweaty, begging lump of meat, and he was just smiling and stroking my balls. When I came it was all him, it was all letting go. I stayed hard for the first time in a decade.

Let’s explore.

Thor’s Training 2 – Open Up Boy

She smiled. It wasn’t the devouring cat smile I’d seen so many times when she talked about the boys she trained, devoured, and kicked out. It was pleasure and kindness and a little hard certainty boring into me. I’d let her do me anytime. Maybe that’s why we were friends all along.

“Okay, David. I’ll see you again. I want to admire your body and your collar when you’re ready.” She smiled and kissed me on the cheek.

“Take good care of my man, Lan. Or I’ll fuck you up,” he chuckled, and I felt all warm inside.

“Come on, big boy, we need to start your training,” Lan said, grabbing the front of my Hawaiian shirt. I wanted to protest, but couldn’t pull my eyes away from the massive muscles of his shoulders bunching and his biceps bulging into softballs as he pulled me bodily from sitting to standing, towering over him. I was afraid the Tommy Bahama would split, but it didn’t.

“Enough of this bullshit,” Lan seemed to be reading my mind. He grabbed each side of the silk shirt and pulled, the wooden buttons popping off.

My mouth opened, but I couldn’t bring myself to object. I watched as he revealed the fuzzy gold mounds of my pecs, the small bowl of my belly, the abs still just visible like manicotti. The fur had crept onto my shoulders, I noticed. My body was shining softly with sweat, my body hair like old gold.

He was noticing me too, his eyes running over me like hunger. I loved the way he looked at me. It made me want to pose. I could see his cock hard in his shorts, and it seemed to be throbbing. But with my head swimming and the music hard in my ears, everything seemed to be throbbing.

He led me toward the back of the club, through a set of celluloid curtains. A thick Samoan stood there in a security t-shirt, watching us pass. He smiled at me like I was a sheep and didn’t know what was inside. I’d worn that grin before. My ass tingled.

Inside, darker music was pumping, and blacklights and bare red bulbs outlined flesh and hid detail.

We passed two men in their 20’s slowly fucking a woman between them, the woman suckling the wide nipple of the tall black man in front of her as he made out with the slender white guy grinding into her from behind. I wanted to be all of them.

Several dudes were leaning against the walls, groaning, eyes rolling, as an assortment of men and women sucked their cocks – small, large, cut, uncut.

Didn’t this only happen in seedy gay places? Where was I?

Lan steered us into an alcove in the back. “Too fuckin tall,” he muttered in a throaty voice. He yanked my shorts down to my boots. He slapped my big cock a few times, leaving red marks. My balls pulled up. He smacked my furry ass. “That’s gonna be delicious.”

He looked into my pale eyes with his dark ones, and I almost fell in. I opened my mouth slightly and leaned forward to kiss him, tilting my head to avoid the hawk of his nose. “Right,” he sneered. “On your knees for me, big boy.”

With massive strength he pulled down on my big traps. My knees buckled and hit the deck. I was facing his huge shaft pointing left inside his chinos, a wet spot near his left hip.

“Kiss it,” he growled.

I licked my lips. I leaned in. I kissed it. It was warm under my lips, and they throbbed together, the veins in his huge dick, and my red lips. A humiliating thrill ran through me. I kissed it again, tasting the precum from the thick cockhead. I licked it. “Yeah, clean my fucking pants of that precum you made me leak, boy. Soak it with your spit.”

I thought about how many guys had sucked my cock, and how I had prided myself on never sucking theirs. It had started out as a way not to get HIV, but then it was a power thing….

I was licking the outline of the fat bulbous head of his cock and the thick shaft, at least an inch longer and thicker than my own monster. I grabbed my cock to jerk off. He shifted and put one of his black boots on my nuts. I gasped and looked up.

There was a wicked flush to his face. “Did I say you could touch your little cock, boy?”

“N-no!” I found myself whining. I pulled my hands away. On instinct, I put them behind my ass, the hairs tickling my wrists.

He smiled, but it wasn’t nice. “Good boy. Time to teach you how to please a man.”

I thought I already knew how to please a man. Maybe I only knew how to please boys.

I was wobbling slightly, but riveted as he slowly unzipped his khakhis. I thought he’d pull his cock out of it, which I thought would be hot seeing it bob and hang from a hole in his pants, but it was too big and his hips were too narrow to pull that off.

He had tight black undergear on underneath. The shining outline of his cock literally made me drool. Slowly, he peeled down his shorts. It seemed to go on forever.

His shaft was thick and olive-colored and completely straight. Big veins snaked along its length, from his huge, smooth nuts to the perfect round swell of the head. I started to lean forward. I had to get that massive beauty into my mouth before I drooled on myself.

Learn to suck itHe grabbed my jaw in his big hands and I managed to wrench my eyes away from his amazing tool. My ass clenched. He spit full in my face, and I closed my eyes just in time. The hot wet of it ran down my left cheek into my beard. I grunted. In surprise, maybe. I felt this swell of gratitude; my dick which no one had ever called ‘little’ jerked. I needed his cock in my mouth or to jerk off. I’d come in seconds, coating the floor. My loads were thick and big. I felt my hairy nuts brush the floor as my balls rolled around in the sack.

“You are the object, David. You need to learn how to please me and earn pleasing me before you get the privilege of even sucking my cock.” His boot tapped between my cock and my balls with the next words, punctuating each one. “You. Get. That?”

I knew what was expected. I kept my eyes closed. “Yes. Sir.” I said, my suddenly deep voice vibrating my belly.

“Good boy,” he said low and gravelly. His heavy cock thumped into my beard, rubbing precum into my hairy cheek. My cock lurched. He noticed and chuckled. His accent was thick as he said, “Your lady friend, she was so right about you. My god, you’re going to make me so fucking happy.”

His hand tightened painfully on my jaw and it opened wide. He said, “Say ‘ahhh’.”

I moaned out an ahhhh.

He slid the plum head of his fat dick inside my mouth. I wanted to close my red lips on it, lash it with my tongue. I’d always been afraid of precum since back in the day, they thought it gave you AIDS. I wanted his to coat my tonsils. I tasted it – salty, slick, as he rubbed the head of his cock on my tongue.

“There’s a good boy. Now close your lips and open your throat and I’m going to fuck your face. And if you open up real good, you’ll get my load down your throat.”

I moaned again. My big lower lip closed greedily on his glans. Under his fingers I extended my lower jaw to open my throat. I held my tongue still with an act of will as I felt a little spurt of precum hit the roof of my mouth. God, I wanted this man.

God I’d wanted this for a long time.

Slowly, he pushed his cock deeper into my mouth. I pushed my tongue forward, further accentuating the forward thrust of my jaw, making my mouth deeper and opening my throat. The long, straight shaft slipped along my lips, mashed my tongue down in my mouth. I moaned like a whore, and he chuckled.

“Open your eyes and look at me, boy, while I own your throat,” Lan’s voice and whatever I was on had me begging for anything he wanted to dish out. My green eyes flew open. His eyes were huge and black like magnets nothing could break free of. “Inhale deep,” he said, sawing his fat cock back and forth through my lips. His big balls were already pulling up in their hairless olive sack.

I took a very deep breath, chest and belly swelling.

“Stay with my eyes,” he said as his fat cock head pushed against my tonsils like I had a choice. “Just go deep into my eyes as my cock goes deep into you.”

I knew I was leaning forward. My throat muscles clenched on the huge plum of his cockhead. His precum was flowing now, slicking my throat. I swallowed around him and he grunted pleasure.

“Deeper now, we’re both going deeper and deeper now, aren’t we David,” he kept up a steady rhythm of speech, matching the steady and back forth of his massive cock easing down my throat. I felt like I was falling away.

I could already barely think. “Deeper and deeper, that’s a good boy. So happy to be so full of cock that owns you, the man that owns you, letting go of that stupid self-will,” I groaned and swallowed the full length of his rod, not even feeling the huge head buried down my throat. My nose was against the flat plane of muscle, that trapezoid at the bottom of his abs.

Both hands clamped on the side of my head. I just leaned there, locked to his eyes, unable to look away.

“Needing sir’s cock so badly you can’t look away, you don’t even need to breathe. The burning in your lungs is a need for my cock, isn’t it, boy?” My drool ran down his ball sack and hit my knee. There was a thrumming pulse running all the way through me now. The burning filled me more and more as his cock filled me as his eyes and voice filled me.

I realized I had never been happy before this moment.

His grip was iron. His cock was iron. He was fucking my face, slowly, deliberately, hard. Tears ran from the corners of my eyes. All I could see was the mountain of man that was Lan above me, the rolling of his muscles as he fucked my skull. The patter continued. The words were a river I couldn’t hold onto.

“All you need is sir’s cock inside you. You don’t need to jerk off to cum. You’re a good boy. Every time I remind you you’re my good boy, you will touch this need, this place, all that old resistance falling away, no need for it. Whenever you masturbate, you will think only of me, need only my cock, otherwise so empty,” he was picking up pace. Some tiny part of me in the back of my head was rolling my eyes, thinking, what, did this guy think he was fucking hypnotizing me? even as that part of me went down into the black need that was being released inside me. That would be realized inside me.

I lost the rest of what he said. My vision was slowly darkening, tunneling down, his thrusts were hard. My throat felt hot and raw.

“Now you’re going to take it, you’re going to remember doing it, needing it, how you submitted all for this, and when … I… cum inside you, you will cum… my … good …. boy… now … CUM!”

His boot scraped down my cock and pressed on my balls. His huge dick expanded inside me even more. It spasmed. I began to swallow as his massive meat unloaded down my throat. One jet. Hard pressure on my nuts and they jerked. Two jets as the plum head pulled back from my throat, bathing my tonsils. Three jets, and my vision was darkness and his eyes as his cum splashed my tongue and the roof of my mouth, salty and strong, like the drinks I’d been given. The pressure in my lungs was the pressure in my cock and the pressure of my jaw.

I came like I’d never cum before. Only Lan’s iron grip on my skull as his plum head rested between my lips kept me up on my knees. Over and over my nuts spasmed under his boot and my cock unloaded against the wall of the alcove, across the floor, across Lan’s boot. The last of his cum drained into my mouth and I swallowed and swallowed.

Something gave way inside me. I was so happy. I would never be this happy again.

I would do anything.

Lan sat down on the little board seat nailed gainst the wall, his muscles bunching and contracting, resting my head on his huge leg. His cock came out from my suckling mouth with a pop.

I was just staring at the ten inches lying there, thick, a darker purple than when he put it in. Lan leaned forward, one hand holding my head, the other my nipple. He began muttering in my ear.

I felt asleep but knew I was wide awake. His words poured into my mind….

Thor’s Training 1 – Admit It

I’m tall, and used to wear long hair down my back in a big braid. I lived at the gym. My friends called me Thor. I have a nice big, fat cock and know how to use it. I would fuck any hot boy that walked. They often ended up calling me ‘sir’, even though all the master/slave stuff didn’t interest me.

We all get older. We can’t work out all the time. The golden fur curled out from a treasure trail to cover my slightly beefier belly and my muscular chest and arms. My hair is short now and I sport a beard that tends to go gold and red in the summer.

The boys that ignored me in my glory days were waiting for me to get to my 40s. I have numbers for the hottest 20-somethings I could fuck any time I wanted. More often than not, now, I was looking for a date, a scotch and a good talk before I watned to use my skillful hands, mouth, body and cock to get some stud to give up his virgin “top” hole to my thick hungry dick.

My best friend these days is a tall, square-shouldered redhead from work named Rhonda. We traded stories of being dominant with men. She joked with me about my search for a long-term thing, telling me I was turning into a lesbian.

She’d been shacked up with some guy for a few weeks and I hadn’t seen her much. She asked me to meet her out at this place called the Watering Hole for a few drinks, maybe meet her new beau.

The place was a little trashier than I expected. I got some cheap Irish whiskey with lots of ice and leaned againts a wall in my shorts and Hawaiian shirt, watching the undersea ballet of beautiful young bodies grind against each other. Seemed like a tangle of straights and gays. Not too surprising South of Market.

The young made way for Rhonda. She was kind of a Norse queen. She joked the 2 of us were royalty. And you knew what happened to Norse heroes….

We hugged. She was looking radiant, sweaty, happy. We joked with each other. She asked me how my lesbian life was going. I told her to fuck off, but I was thinking about how long it’d been since I’d been the one who’d been swept off his feet. How my ass longed to get fucked even while my brain protested.

“Okay, so I’ve told Lan all about you,” Lan was her guy, apparently, “and he’s dying to meet you.” Her smile was big. That made me a little nervous for some reason.

Rhonda got me a larger glass of cheaper whisky. It was a little cloudy and had a bitter aftertaste. But even on my big body with all my resistance to liquor, it started making me warm and relaxed. I found myself subtly flexing for boys who were noticing me.

She brought Lan back with the third round of drinks. Mine a repeat of whatever strong, crappy whisky she’d gotten me. He was intensely hot. Maybe Italian, or Turkish. Not her usual type, which was mine too: thin, smooth, boyish. This was a *man*. He was little, maybe 5’9, but built. Big shoulders, big pex. A light dusting of dark hair on his arms. He was wearing a black UnderArmor compression top and he looked like a gladiator with his hawk nose, his crop of black beard stubble. He was wearing chinos that showed a big bubble butt and a big package pushed out the front.

I realized Rhonda and Lan had been talking. I felt kind of out of it. I had a huge grin plastered on my face.

“I guess you like him, huh, ‘Thor’?” Rhonda joked at me. She reached over and slapped my dick in my linen shorts. I hadn’t realized I’d gotten hard and was poking out obscenely. At 45, I didn’t really just get spontaneously hard anymore.

“Ya, hey, Lan. Nice to meet you, man.” I stuck my hand out across the table. I was weirdly unembarrased. Not that I got embarrased too often anyway, but with my fat dick tenting my shorts….

He took my hand in that power grip dudes do to power trip other men. He had big hands for a little guy, turning my slightly bigger hand under. My dick throbbed.

“Lan and I have had a really great time, haven’t we Lan?” she smacked his ass hard enough I knew he liked it, and that he wasn’t wearing any underwear – maybe a jockstrap. I could feel my cock splurt onto my linen shorts, getting them wet. Why did I feel 19 again?

“And, ‘Thor’, I told him all about you, and everything you and I have talked about,” she went on, stroking his ass. Was Rhonda offering me her boyfriend to fuck? She knew I wasn’t into the ladies….

“I think he needs a hug, Lan,” she said, stepping back.

He moved around the table and slowly laced his arms around my middle, pressing the big bulk of his little muscle body against my much bigger body. He flexed his massive six-pack against my cock. He was sweating through the UA top and it felt good against me. I sighed and rested my arms around his shoulders. He moaned into my chest hair and then turned his head and squeezed like little guys always do, across my floating ribs. I flexed my abs so I could take the deadly cobra squeeze. It hurt like hell, but my dick jumped against him, squirting precum through my linen shorts onto his already-wet shirt. He’d been dancing.
I kissed the top of his head the way the boys like. He eased up on the squeeze and moved both hands to my big muscle ass and squeezed hard, digging in. I groaned involuntarily.

It was a little while later. I’d lost some time. Rhonda and I were sitting on the couches at the back of the club, screened by a bunch of 8mm strips of celluloid as curtains.

Rhonda was holding the sides of my face. It was intimate, but not sexual.

“You’re so big, David,” she said, using my name. “I wasn’t sure how much to give you, are you okay?”

I felt soft, open, happier than I’d been in years. I’d leaked so much precum my shorts were slick with it all the way down to my ass. I was swimmy and happy. I nodded.

“I know you have trouble letting go. We are so close, I wanted to give you what you wanted. I wanted to make you happy, becuase your advice and your friendship has meant so much to me.”

I nodded, smiling big, wanting to kiss her on the cheek. To hug her. To have a cock up my ass.

“Tell me the real truth, David. Do you really want to let go? Do you really want to feel the other side of that dominant energy you’ve held for so many men over the years to make them happy? Are you really interested in letting go and having a beautiful man take charge of you? David, I really want to know the truth.”

The truth had been slowly busting its way out of me. The truth had been building for 20 years, since I became dominant because so many dudes saw my size and my strength and my strong personality and wanted me to tie them up, fuck them, dominate them, be in charge of their hot little holes.

In a huge flash I saw how I’d really been a kind of submissive the whole time, changing myself to make other men happy.

I looked into her green eyes. She was a queen. But I was no king. I was a hero, maybe. I was a servant, not a ruler. “Oh, my god, Rhonda, for that guy? For Lan, God, yes.” I waited a moment, and the begging came out of me, “Please. Will you let him have me?”

I was horrified at myself in the background. I’d stuck my fat cock in so many beggin boys. And this sounded just like them. I’d always kind of been disgusted by their weakness and turned on by how I was strong… but I was weak. That exact same way. Dominating them all while not being dominant myself made me that way.

Rhonda pulled on my beard. It hurt a little. “David, really? Do you want him to have you? Lan and I figured out that’s what he needs. To be with a man he can own.”

I nodded. I reached up with my big hands and pulled her strong, smooth hands away.

“It’s what I’ve always wanted.” I was harder than I’d ever been. And content while I freaked out. My ass clenched and unclenched. Maybe now I’d finally have a reason to own all those butt plugs I’d bought and never used.

She nodded. Satisfied.

What’s the fucking point?

Glad you asked.

I’m tired of being a good boy. Or not being enough of a good boy.

I don’t want to have to hold myself back and pretend that normal sex and bland relationships are interesting.

I know there are guys for whom the dressing up thing works. And, there are so many of us it doesn’t work for. I look at a dude in a leather harness and nothing happens. It’s drag, but with leather. The guy is hot or not, it has nothing to do with how much dead cow and chrome he’s got on. Some dude in shiny pants and a weird nazi-looking cap telling me to lick his boots I just find annoying. Some hot guy in shorts getting me on my knees to worship his beautiful feet – I can see that.

Maybe this resonates with you. I want to explore power exchanges between men. Not the tying up, dressing up way it usually gets done, but really between men directly. As play, as life, as intensity.

I’m going to use myself as a guinea pig. I’m going to write jackoff material.

Stay with me.